Here's a short list of some of the craziest, wackiest moments and claims coming out of the Talmud:
5) Rabbi Mona claims that, if a man touches his penis, his hand should be cut off, lest he arouse himself. (Shabbat 108b:13)
If you have any other crazy moments you'd like to share, please do so in the comments! Honestly, there are way too many to show in a single blog post, but I figured these are a good start. 😃
1) Rabbi Yochanan says that it would be good if Jewish women fantasize about his beauty while they have sex with their husbands. (Bava Metzia 84a:9)
2) Rav Acha stays overnight in synagogue. A seven-headed demon appears before him. Rav Acha starts praying, and bowing down. Every time he bows, one of the heads of the demon falls off. After seven bows, the demon dies. (Kiddushin 29b)
3) Also, if you actually want to see demons, take a firstborn black-cat, burn it in fire, grind it up and put the ashes in your eyes, and you will see them. (Berakhot 6a)
4) Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai and his son gain Cyclops's (from X-Men) Optic Blast power by learning Torah for 12 years. (Shabbat 33b:7)
3) Also, if you actually want to see demons, take a firstborn black-cat, burn it in fire, grind it up and put the ashes in your eyes, and you will see them. (Berakhot 6a)
4) Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai and his son gain Cyclops's (from X-Men) Optic Blast power by learning Torah for 12 years. (Shabbat 33b:7)
(The next Tanna to gain powers will have Wolverine claws, maybe?)
5) Rabbi Mona claims that, if a man touches his penis, his hand should be cut off, lest he arouse himself. (Shabbat 108b:13)
If you have any other crazy moments you'd like to share, please do so in the comments! Honestly, there are way too many to show in a single blog post, but I figured these are a good start. 😃
I like the Rabbah bar bar Hana yales in Baba Batra, especially the one where he saw a giant frog as tall as a tower being eaten by a giant crocodile who get eaten by a giant crow that just chills on a suprisingly strong tree.
ReplyDeleteNow, you'd think he uses that as an allegory or some code for bigger ideas, but no. Rav Papa comes along and says "Yeah it's true, I wouldn't have believed it haven't I seen it myself! "
A couple of pranksters. Or they were really high on some shrooms.
Right lol. The problem with the "allegory" claim is that first of all, how do they know it's an allegory for something more? And second of all, if it is, how do you know your interpretation is correct?
DeleteOr perhaps they really were hallucinating.
Maimonides wrote in his essay called Chelek that people who take talmudic statements and midrashim literally are fools while those who dismiss them entirely are also fools. Midrashim, although not literally true, were designed to teach lessons. They are parables.
ReplyDeleteHow do you know which ones are meant to be taken literally, and which ones are meant to be taken figuratively? And how do you objectively determine which one applies where?
DeleteAll of them are parables.
DeleteHow do you know? How can you tell the difference between an intended parable and a literally-intentioned story? Give me your mechanism that you seem to think is objectively able to do this.
DeleteAgain, Maimonides wrote in his essay called Chelek that people who take midrashim literally are fools, those who dismiss them entirely are also fools, because midrashim although not true were designed to teach lessons. They are parables.
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